spring break and ½

yeah so i thought i was all clever and smooth--if she didn't feel about me the way i was quite sure i felt about her, i could just pretend all i wanted was to see the movie (i really did want to see it, after all) and of course it's terribly pathetic to go see a movie as a onesome.  the way she and i had been talking up until that point had me mostly convinced that she did return my feelings, and so i fully intended to make some form of a move toward a higher form of "us" with her.  i was well aware of the fact that i was only but recently out of a relationship, but somehow i knew almost certainly that the feelings i have for this girl were true--that i was not in fact merely attempting to cling to the next closest thing to a girlfriend i could find.

and so we went to the theatre together and just as i had expected, from the moment we got into the car together i was having an absolutely wonderful time.  we walked together into the theatre (after i had made a bathroom break, of course) and as we sat down i just knew that i was not going to make it through an entire two or so hours sitting next to a girl to whom i am attracted in a wide assortment of fashions without kissing her.  the whole time up until the movie began certainly was nowhere near awkward--we never did have a problem finding enough to talk about.  so the movie started and there i sat next to her, watching her almost as much as the movie--recalling how i'd found her incredibly beautiful since the first day i saw her at school.  my gaze found its way to her lips and all i could think of is how wonderful it would feel to have them pressed against mine, though i soon realized that to have her find me looking at her in the darkness of the theatre was not exactly something i wanted to happen that evening.  against the wishes of my heart as well as much of my mind and body, i attempted to shift my focus as well as my gaze toward the screen, which was much less difficult with my gaze than it was with my thoughts.

after watching a respectable portion of the movie, a thought that i should kiss her right then formed in my mind, and so i turned toward her.  it seemed to me that whatever had affected me had also its influence on her because she too had turned toward me and her face read in such a way to assure me that this was most certainly the time we were meant to kiss . . .